Reveal Yourself

Typically, I would lead off with a little poem here. But in regards to what your about to read, I would be nothing short of a hypocrite if I were to hide behind my many metaphors and rhythmic tongue for this one.

Covered in preconceived notions of what it means to be happy or content, while constantly surrounding ourselves with apathetic hearts and fake smiles, the conceptual design of your own soul simply becomes clouded.  It’s as if our prototypes are who we would truly like to be, but once tested by the world, we feel the need input changes to our design?  While on the topic of designs, have you ever thought about what you would have looked like if there was a first draft or idea sketch done of yourself?

I picture the first rough outline of myself to be a shadowy figure letting go of a balloon, body dressed in bricks, fingers bleeding words, standing beneath a cloud of falling question marks, and I cannot forget… my heart is singing from the paper page, something about how badly I would grow to want love.  There would be some designer notes scribbled at the bottom of the page that reads:

-          This one will be frowned upon, for his ability to challenge everything

-          He is going to break hearts, help hearts, and fall in love with love, and life

-          He is fucked!

I have justified my insanity as difference, my beliefs to be opened minded, and my heart to be an open wound that loves the salty taste of love, as well as the sweet pain that comes along with it. I have claimed myself to be a poet, a hopeless romantic from an era that never existed, and I’ll be your biggest mistake from the hellish corners of the stars if you ever tell me to bow down to anything besides the moon. I despise television unless sports are on, love all genres of movies and books (yes even romance, so deal with it), and I listen to any music that can cure me. I think a woman’s body is the most astonishing thing ever created, but I think sometimes I love it too much- love them so much, it often hurts. I have been in love with beautiful girls before, and I have been severely broken as well, but I enjoy piecing myself back together. I fucking hate anything with a Right Wing, and I support gay-pride and equality for everyone from the deepest parts of my heart. Ummmm…. I hate being told what to wear, when to wear it, and what is acceptable in certain situations. I think the interview process is a load of fake shit, and if you have anything to say about tattoos, or judge people based only on the way they look, I already know, I probably hate your existence…. Is there anything else?

Of course there is more, but it is impossible to just sum up yourself in a paragraph of immaturely babbling about your views. But the purpose of that was to show you, I am not afraid to be that “first rough outline” of myself. I don’t understand the concept of being someone you’re not, or becoming something someone else wants you to be.  The world wasn't put here to change who we are in the thoughts of hiding who we were always meant to be, and we sure as hell weren't put here to conform; we were meant for much more. But we will never amount to anything more than the amounts around us, unless we are willing to be more, willing to walk within our souls, willing to dance in everything they say we shouldn't dance too.

Take off that mask, and look into the mirror. The reflection is beautiful, no matter what you think you see… I promise you. Wear that skin and spite the world with it. Let society stone you with its insults and judgments, and just bleed out all over the streets. They will drown in your carelessness of red, and just when the colors read stop, do more. Become that first idea-concept of yourself. Become that prototype that didn't quite fit. Become something more than became…